What Did You Get?
by darth tasuki
Summary: Ramza's thoughts on Delita at the end of the game.


This was inspired, by...well, the end of the game. Wretched Delita. _ I'm sure there's some LOTR influence in here, as well (though I haven't seen/read/listened to it in a while!). If there is, you'll find it. (And yes, I know this is sappy.)

Disclaimer: Final Fantasy Tactics (and all its characters) is property of Squaresoft. You should know that by now, dum--er, silly. And somebody else could have written a better one, but ya know what? Nobody did. D

__

What Did You Get?

"Ramza... What did you get?"

__

...I, Delita? What did _I_ get?

The evening dew sparkles in the sun's last rays, cast away by my chocobo's large, clawed feet. This is the Ivalice I remember. This is the world I have grown up in. It's my home, and nostalgia of more innocent times lashes me like the wind in my face. So many people, all wronged in so many different ways. So many with goals to achieve in any way they can. Even if it's through bloodshed and manipulation--right, Delita?

What happened to make you so, Delita? The pain of Teta's death? I understand how much you loved her. I feel the same way about Alma. But we all feel pain, Delita. We all suffer. The decision is ours to make the best of it. You were fooled, King Delita. You confused the best with the worst. 

What did _I_ get? That is the wrong question, Delita. The question is, what did _you _get? You're so wrapped up in your desire for personal gain, and what do you have to show for it? A kingdom, yes... But do you have anything else? Anything that actually _means_ something? You can be emperor of the whole world, Delita, but if you have obtained it by your lies and your cunning, you have nothing.

What did _I_ get, Delita? I received hope. Where were you when I saw the miracle that returned breath to Malak's lungs? Where were you when Olan pledged his friendship to me? 

You were destroying hope, Delita. You were killing people. You thought you could sacrifice everything and be a hero, that you would inspire hope in the hearts of many. But in your concern for the people, you lost sight of the individual. Oh, you sacrificed a lot to get where you are now: a lot of _lives _that were never yours to give away. In that way, Delita, you are like Vormav. How blind have you been? Can't you see that in your effort to rebuild, to stop being used, you were as destructive as he? Evil filled his soul, and turned him into a demon with the stone's aid. You were a monster without the appearance of one. If you had gotten a holy stone, would you have transformed? 

You've lied to everyone, Delita. Perhaps Ivalice will be a better place--in the _distant_ future--because of what you've done, but was your _soul_ a reasonable price? If only Teta, who sacrificed herself so that you could live, could see you now--wouldn't she be proud? Wouldn't she feel that she had done well in letting you live?

...I suspect that, because of the strange bond blood creates, she would have saved you anyway. She fulfilled her purpose. But what about you, Delita? Instead of becoming the person she would have liked, you became the monster you are now. Instead of trying to understand why she saved you, you took her death as a personal insult. And you've spent the rest of your life trying to exact vengeance for that insult. 

What did _you_ get, Delita? Have you ever seen a miracle, like I have seen? Have you felt such love for people that you can hardly contain it? Have you been with them when they mourned? Have you always been there for Ovelia? Your claims about her have fallen into the dirt. And do you know why? It's because she finally realized what you are. I don't think even you have realized what you are yet. Don't you understand, Delita? For a person like you, you who give no love, no love can be given.

What did _I_ get? ...Friendship and peace, Delita. I received endless peace and friends worth more than all the kingdoms in the world. When we were up in the airship, I saw my friends--_heroes_, every one of them--die. Orlandu, who smiled at me as the ship crashed down--he forgives me all that I have led him through. Agrias, who believed in me for as long as she knew me, who trusted me even when I was unsure. Mustadio, who became a very dear friend as he stayed beside me through blood and tears. Rafa and Malak, Beowulf and Reis, Meliadoul, and all those who followed me from the time we were mere cadets--all these heroes were trying to find peace, and they found it through death. They stayed with me and trusted me, giving up their lives because they saw what I saw and believed what I believed. Yes, Delita, through the rivers of blood and hatred, I have befriended heroes. And you? You don't even have _cowards_ as friends.

What did _you_ get, Delita? Is your soul filled with tranquility? Will you pretend that you can't feel the many layers of blood that cover your hands? How many people have you betrayed, betraying even yourself because you will not be used? 

I, Delita... I have no regrets about leaving this world. Will you be able to say the same? What did _you_ get, Delita? Do you feel content with your ill-gotten gains? When you lay down and die, how many will mourn to see you go? You've been so obsessed with manipulating people that you've lost sight of what's important. When you die, it won't matter if you were king. Do you know why? It's because you can't take your kingdom with you. I can take my accomplishments with me, because they're right here, inside of me, where no thief can steal them. Delita, no matter how much you think you've done, if you haven't been happy, your life has been nothing but dross... and you may as well have never been born. And isn't that a wonderful feeling to have, Delita, when there's no one left to manipulate and you're facing death all alone? Oh, but you won't be alone, King Delita. You'll have the cries of all your victims to keep you company throughout eternity. 

What did _I_ get? ...Happiness, Delita. I have happiness. Like you, I went my own way. I obeyed my own rules. Was I manipulated? Am I alone? No, Delita. I suffered all kinds of pain and agony, but I have my reward. I can leave this life with no regrets. I have seen too many people die regretting something they have or have not done. Zalbag died regretting his whole life. I saw it on his face. Wiegraf died... regretting the loss of his humanity, if only he had been able to see through the eyes of Velius. I am not like them. Are you?

I want to be like Cidolfas, Delita. When I saw the look in his eyes as the airship came crashing down, as Altima struggled in the throes of death, I knew. I understood that all we have done has a purpose. It does not matter so much what the purpose is, so long as it is good and we give it our all. So long as there is a truth to be found, I will find it. So long as there is goodness in the world, it will be worth fighting for. 

No, I do not regret passing from this life to the next. My body cries in pain, but my heart cries with joy. I've been rewarded, Delita. We all have. We lost so much, but gained more. We will always remember, Delita. Time and space will pass and shift, covering up all memories eventually, but we will never forget. 

Ivalice is as I had remembered it, but different. My eyes, back when I was young and naive, were much larger, but saw so little. Like you. I can see now, Delita. I understand. If only your hardened heart could, too.

The wind sails through me, calling me. I wish you could hear me, Delita. I wish I could say so many things to you. But I can't. My time for farewells is gone, Delita... for even now, my body vanishes like the mist...


End file.
